A Lifestyle Blog about Simplifying Healthy Living
Eleven Months! Gaining confidence with walking – discovered a lip tie and tongue tie – extremely talkative – new hair cut – quite the climber – Insatiable appetite – looks most like daddy – constantly testing limits
At the suggestion of a friend we entered Asher into the Gerber Photo Search 2013 contest. Gosh, I know I’m biased but seriously, how cute is that face?!
If you would like to vote for him, just go HERE (or click on the photo above), which will take you to the contest’s Facebook page where you can click on the vote button and feel free to share his entry if you feel so inclined.
Thank you for the support!
10 months! 19 pounds – went to China – first bike ride – first boat ride – first horse back ride – first fever: 102 degrees Fahrenheit – very opinionated – developing food preferences and voices them strongly – started WALKING! (although still prefers to crawl)
It was so nice to spend two weeks with my family. We spent the first week in Beijing which was nice but the real highlight was the second week that we spent traveling around Yunnan. People were flocking to Asher everywhere we went, countless strangers held my child and even more photographed him. It was quite the adventure, from hiking tiger leaping gorge in Shangri-la to a 6 hour bike ride in Dali, to a horse back ride and boat ride in Lijiang. Here are a few of my favorite shots from our trip:
Is screen time harmful to babies and young toddlers? This is an issue of our age, something that previous generations never had to worry about. This podcast by NPR helps to shed some light on the issue. Passive screen time should be discouraged, while active screen time is actually beneficial.
In general my thoughts have always been that I don’t want my children to have much screen time. I don’t want them watching TV (in fact I wish we didn’t even own one) and I really don’t want them playing video games or having smart phones. My reasoning is this: I want our children to live in the real world, to have real interactions and to learn valuable social skills. I don’t want them to be bombarded by TV commercials telling them that they need ‘stuff’to be happy. I don’t want them to play video games at the cost of going outside and playing or using their imagination. I don’t want them to be so uncomfortable in silence or boredom that they automatically turn on a device.
Now with that said, Asher Facetimes practically everyday with one or more sets of grandparents and I have never thought to include that into my ‘minimal screen time’ rule because I see how beneficial it is for all the parties involved. I will also on occasion put an episode of Sesame Street or Curious George on Netflix. Admittedly, I always feel guilty doing so, but ultimately sometimes you just gotta do whatcha gotta do. I doesn’t happen often, but it does happen. Moderation (maybe even extreme moderation) is key here. A little bit of passive screen time won’t set him back too much. Do I wish that he didn’t have any? Absolutely, but I’m not perfect.
The true test for me though, just like Jennifer Grover from the podcast, is to learn to rein in my attention to my laptop in front of Asher. I believe that that best way to ensure that he is engaged in the present world is for Raf and I to set that example.
So go listen to this and let me know your thoughts.
9 months!-18lbs 14oz-29 1/4 inches long-started finger feeding-cruises around-dances to music by rocking side to side-learned to suck from a straw-loves food and eats everything-has developed separation anxiety, especially with mommy-grinds his teeth.
We waited until Asher was 6 months old before feeding him solids. I agonized over what to give him first. I wanted it to be something flavorful and with a high nutrient content and the standard rice cereal just wasn’t cutting it. I went back and forth between avocado and egg yolk. Ultimately, egg yolk won out.
So I carefully boiled an egg, removed all the egg white and then blended the yolk with some breast milk. Asher was more than eager for me to feed him this new and exciting concoction. He had been studying us closely whenever we ate anything and was clearly excited to experience this intriguing process for himself.
I scooped out a spoonful of the egg yolk and as the spoon approached his mouth, he leaned forward and opened up as wide as he could. He then closed his mouth on the spoon and a look of sheer befuddlement flashed over his face, to quickly be replaced with one of absolute disgust and indignation as he promptly began gagging in an attempt to expel the vial substance from his mouth.
This was our first introduction into solids. Not to worry though, things steadily improved from there. Although, admittedly, after such a start it could only get better.
As recommended by his pediatrician, we did single introduction, however I didn’t wait 4 days for most foods. If I was giving him something that was more allergenic then I definitely waited longer, but otherwise I’d give him something new every 1-2 days. Since we waited until he was 6 months old to introduce foods to him, his pediatrician assured us that we could give him anything and everything.
I was determined to make my own baby food and since we were gifted with a Baby Bullet by a dear friend it was such a breeze. We used it for a solid 2 months and Asher was sucking food down like he was hollow, so I was using it a lot! Whoever said that a baby will let you know when they are full by pushing food out of their mouth, obviously hadn’t met my son. Asher would eat and eat until he had stuffed himself so much that he vomited all over the place. After this happened once on Raf’s watch and once on mine, we quickly learnt that we couldn’t rely on him to send us any signals and thus adjusted accordingly.
Even though I made the majority of his food, I tended to throw a baby food pouch in my bag for when we were out of the house, because they were SO convenient and easy. I really loved the ones by Plum Organics, but there are lots of different brands and they all come in TONS of flavors. They also made introducing new foods super easy and simple.
When Asher was 7 months old I began tentatively attempting to give him food that was more textured but he flat out refused to eat anything that wasn’t pureed. He even began smelling his food before deciding whether or not to open his mouth, in fact he would only eat certain vegetables if they had been roasted and seasoned (frankly I don’t blame him). Shortly after he turned 8 months old I just decided one day that he was perfectly capable of finger feeding himself (since he was rather adept with the puffs), so I stopped blending his food and simply gave him small chunks of stuff that were on the softer side and lo and behold he happily fed himself!
Some of his first foods: egg, avocado, banana, sweet potato, yam, multi-grain cereal, rice cereal, peas, squash, zucchini, cauliflower, broccoli, blueberry, pear, peach, pasta, chicken, beef, cheese, greek yogurt, hummus, black beans, watermelon, plum, quinoa, spinach, kale, asparagus, nectarine, carrot, bread.
He now eats whatever we are eating and pretty much loves it all. We’re so lucky and I can only hope he continues to be such an easy going eater, especially considering that we have adopted a plant based diet, but more on that later.
started crawling – got first 2 teeth – sits upright unassisted – pulls to standing – loves chewing on shoes and power cords – bath time in big tub now – only sucks left thumb – looks like mommy and daddy – loves to eat and seemingly never full
Obviously, I may need to rethink recording his milestones in dry erase marker since they don’t survive long enough to be photographed…
I recently read this article, which subsequently inspired me to put together this map. Some people feel that there are right ways and wrong ways to breastfeed in public and that some of those ways are immodest. I don’t agree. Nothing about breastfeeding is immodest. Luckily, I have never been asked to cover up, move or discontinue while breastfeeding in public, but if it does ever happen I will stand up for my right to feed my child. It is important to know the laws regarding breastfeeding, because when we are armed with knowledge it makes it easier to bring about change. So in honor of National Breastfeeding Month I made this map, which gives you the state laws on public breastfeeding at a glance. For the full laws in each state see below. I recommend reading the laws of your state carefully because there are some subtle differences in terminology that can make a big difference. For example Virginia’s law states that a woman may breastfeed in any public place owned by the state, while Florida’s states that you can breastfeed in any public or private place.
Federal law:
Pub. L. No. 106-058, § 647: Notwithstanding any other provision of law, a woman may breastfeed her child at any location in a Federal building or on Federal property, if the woman and her child are otherwise authorized to be present at the location.
State Laws:
Ala. Code § 22-1-13 (2006): A mother may breastfeed her child in any location, public or private, where the mother is otherwise authorized to be present.
Alaska Stat. § 29.25.080: A municipality may not enact an ordinance that prohibits or restricts a woman breast-feeding a child in a public or private location where the woman and child are otherwise authorized to be.
Ariz. Rev. Stat. Ann § 41-1443 (2006): A mother is entitled to breast-feed in any area of a public place or a place of public accommodation where the mother is otherwise lawfully present.
Ark. Stat. Ann. § 20-27-2001 (2007): A woman may breastfeed a child in a public place or any place where other individuals are present.
Cal. Civil Code § 43.3 (1997): Notwithstanding any other provision of law, a mother may breastfeed her child in any location, public or private, except the private home or residence of another, where the mother and the child are otherwise authorized to be present.
Colo. Rev. Stat. § 25-6-302 (2004): A mother may breastfeed in any place she has a right to be.
Conn. Gen. Stat. § 46a-64: It shall be a discriminatory practice in violation of this section . . . for a place of public accommodation, resort or amusement to restrict or limit the right of a mother to breast-feed her child; and § 53-34b: No person may restrict or limit the right of a mother to breast-feed her child.
Del. Code Ann. tit. 31 § 310 (1997): Notwithstanding any provisions of law to the contrary, a mother shall be entitled to breast-feed her child in any location of a place of public accommodation wherein the mother is otherwise permitted.
D.C. Code Ann. § 2-1402.82(c)(1): A woman shall have the right to breastfeed her child in any location, public or private, where she has the right to be with her child, without respect to whether the mother’s breast or any part of it is uncovered during or incidental to the breastfeeding of her child.
Fla. Stat. § 383.015(1) (1993): A mother may breastfeed her baby in any location, public or private, where the mother is otherwise authorized to be, irrespective of whether the nipple of the mother’s breast is uncovered during or incidental to the breastfeeding.
Ga. Code § 31-1-9 (1999): [A] mother may breast-feed her baby in any location, public or private, where the mother is otherwise authorized to be irrespective of whether the nipple of the mother’s breast is uncovered during or incidental to the breast-feeding.
Hawaii Rev. Stat. § 489.21: It is a discriminatory practice to deny, or attempt to deny, the full and equal enjoyment of the goods, services, facilities, privileges, advantages, and accommodations of a place of public accommodations to a woman because she is breastfeeding a child.
No state law protecting the right to breastfeed in public. The only law with regards to breastfeeding has to do with jury exemption.
Ill. Rev. Stat. ch. 740 § 137 (2004): A mother may breastfeed her baby in any location, public or private, where the mother is otherwise authorized to be, irrespective of whether the nipple of the mother’s breast is uncovered during or incidental to the breastfeeding; however a mother considering whether to breastfeed her baby in a place of worship shall comport her behavior with the norms appropriate in that place of worship.
Iowa Code § 135.30A (2002): Notwithstanding any other provision of law to the contrary, a woman may breast-feed the woman’s own child in any public place where the woman’s presence is otherwise authorized.
Kan. Stat. Ann. § 65-1,248(b): A mother may breastfeed in any place she has a right to be.
Ky. Rev. Stat. § 211-755(1) (2006): Notwithstanding any other provision of the law, a mother may breast-feed her baby or express breast milk in any location, public or private, where the mother is otherwise authorized to be.
La. Rev. Stat. Ann. § 51. 2247.1(B) (2001): Notwithstanding any other provision of law to the contrary, a mother may breastfeed her baby in any place of public accommodation, resort, or amusement.
Me. Rev. Stat. Ann. tit. 5, § 4634 (2001): Notwithstanding any other provision of law, a mother may breast-feed her baby in any location, public or private, where the mother is otherwise authorized to be.
Md. Health-General Code Ann. § 20-801 (2003): (a) A mother may breast-feed her child in any public or private location in which the mother and child are authorized to be. (b) A person may not restrict or limit the right of a mother to breast-feed her child.
Mass. Gen. Laws Ann. ch. 111 § 221(a) (2008): A mother may breastfeed her child in any public place or establishment or place which is open to and accepts or solicits the patronage of the general public and where the mother and her child may otherwise lawfully be present.
Mich. Comp. Laws § 41.181, § 67.1aa & § 117.4i et seq. (1994): Public nudity does not include any of the following:
(a) A woman’s breastfeeding of a baby whether or not the nipple or areola is exposed during or incidental to the feeding.
Minn. Stat. §145.905: A mother may breast-feed in any location, public or private, where the mother and child are otherwise authorized to be, irrespective of whether the nipple of the mother’s breast is uncovered during or incidental to the breast-feeding.
Miss. Code Ann. § 17-25-7 (2006): A mother may breast-feed her child in any location, public or private, where the mother is otherwise authorized to be, without respect to whether the mother’s breast or any part of it is covered during or incidental to the breast-feeding.
Mo. Rev. Stat. § 191.918 (1999): Notwithstanding any other provision of law to the contrary, a mother may, with as much discretion as possible, breast-feed her child in any public or private location where the mother is otherwise authorized to be.
Mont. Code Ann. § 50-19-501 (2002): Provides that the breastfeeding of a child in any location, public or private, cannot be considered a nuisance, indecent exposure, sexual conduct, or obscenity.
2011 Neb. Laws, L.B. 197: A mother may breastfeed her child in any public or private location where the mother is otherwise authorized to be.
Nevada
Nev. Rev. Stat. § 201.232(2) (1995): Notwithstanding any other provision of law, a mother may breast feed her child in any public or private location where the mother is otherwise authorized to be, irrespective of whether the nipple of the mother’s breast is uncovered during or incidental to the breast feeding.
N.H. Rev. Stat. Ann. § 132:10-d (1999): Breast-feeding a child does not constitute an act of indecent exposure and to restrict or limit the right of a mother to breast-feed her child is discriminatory.
N.J. Rev. Stat. § 26:4B-4/5 (1997): Notwithstanding any provision of law to the contrary, a mother shall be entitled to breast feed her baby in any location of a place of public accommodation, resort or amusement wherein the mother is otherwise permitted.
N.M. Stat. Ann. § 28-20-1 (1999): A mother may breastfeed her child in any location, public or private, where the mother is otherwise authorized to be present.
N.Y. Civil Rights Law § 79-e (1994): Notwithstanding any other provision of law, a mother may breast feed her baby in any location, public or private, where the mother is otherwise authorized to be, irrespective of whether or not the nipple of the mother’s breast is covered during or incidental to the breast feeding.
N.C. Gen. Stat. § 14-190.9 (1993): Notwithstanding any other provision of law, a woman may breast feed in any public or private location where she is otherwise authorized to be, irrespective of whether the nipple of the mother’s breast is uncovered during or incidental to the breast feeding.
N.D. Cent. Code § 23-12-16: If the woman acts in a discreet and modest manner, a woman may breastfeed her child in any location, public or private, where the woman and child are otherwise authorized to be.
Ohio Rev. Code Ann. § 3781.55 (2005): A mother is entitled to breast-feed her baby in any location of a place of public accommodation wherein the mother otherwise is permitted.
Okla. Stat. tit. 63, § 1-234 (2004): The Legislature hereby declares that breast-feeding a baby constitutes a basic act of nurturing to which every baby has a right and which should be encouraged in the interests of maternal and child health. In furtherance of this right, a mother may breast-feed her baby in any location where the mother is otherwise authorized to be
Or. Rev. Stat. § 109.001 (1999): A woman may breast-feed her child in a public place.
P.L. 90, No. 28, Cl. 35 (enacted July 8, 2007): The Freedom to Breastfeed Act permits a mother to nurse her child in public; and provides that breastfeeding may not be considered a nuisance, indecent exposure, sexual conduct or obscenity.
Rhode Island
R.I. Gen. Laws § 23-13.5-1 (2008): A woman may feed her child by bottle or breast in any place open to the public.
S.C. Code Ann. § 63-5-40(A)(B) (2008): A woman may breastfeed her child in any location where the mother and her child are authorized to be. Breastfeeding a child in a location where the mother is authorized to be is not considered indecent exposure.
S.D. Codified Laws Ann. § 22-22-24.1 and § 22-24A-2 (2002): South Dakota law exempts breastfeeding from public indecency laws. “Nudity”…this term does not include a mother’s breast-feeding of her baby irrespective of whether or not the nipple is covered during or incidental to feeding.
Tenn. Code Ann. § 68-58-101 and 102 (2006): A mother may breastfeed in any public or private place she is authorized to be. Breastfeeding shall not be considered public indecency or nudity, obscene, or sexual conduct.
Tex. Health Code Ann. § 165.002 (1995): A mother is entitled to breast-feed her baby in any location in which the mother is authorized to be.
Utah Code Ann. § 17-15-25 (1995): The county legislative body may not prohibit a woman’s breast feeding in any location where she otherwise may rightfully be, irrespective of whether the breast is uncovered during or incidental to the breast feeding.
Vt. Stat. Ann. tit. 9, § 4502 (j) (2002): Notwithstanding any other provision of law, a mother may breastfeed her child in any place of public accommodation in which the mother and child would otherwise have a legal right to be.
Va. Code § 2.2-1147.1 (2002): Notwithstanding any other provision of law, a woman may breast-feed her child at any location where that woman would otherwise be allowed on property that is owned, leased or controlled by the Commonwealth as defined in § 2.2-1147.
Wash. Rev. Code § 49.60.30(g): [It is] the right of a mother to breastfeed her child in any place of public resort, accommodation, assemblage, or amusement.
No state law protecting the right to breastfeed in public but if this bill gets passed that could change.
Wis. Stat. § 253.16: A mother may breast−feed her child in any public or private location where the mother and child are otherwise authorized to be. In such a location, no person may prohibit a mother from breast−feeding her child, direct a mother to move to a different location to breast−feed her child, direct a mother to cover her child or breast while breast−feeding, or otherwise restrict a mother from breast−feeding her child as provided in this section.
Wyo. Stat. § 6-4-201 (2007): Wyoming law exempts breastfeeding from public indecency laws. The act of breastfeeding an infant child, including breastfeeding in any place where the woman may legally be, does not constitute public indecency
Resources:
Nursing Freedom Breastfeeding Laws
Breastfeeding Law – know your rights – a great resource for all laws pertaining to breastfeeding, not just the ones to do with public nursing.
Sleep training is definitely a hot button topic. Whether you’re all for sleep training or adamantly against it, you’ve probably felt judged at some point, which leaves you feeling like you have to defend your decision to some parent who is in the other camp.
If you’ve been reading my blog a while, you know that I’m pro sleep training but I don’t believe that it is right for every family. I’ve always said that if what you’re doing is working for you, then by all means continue. If you’re happy and the baby is happy and you aren’t walking around like a zombie from lack of sleep then go about your business. But if you’re miserable, cranky and at your wits end, then perhaps sleep training is something you may want to look into.
There are a lot of misconceptions out there about sleep training. Allow me to go over some of the ones I’ve encountered:
MYTH: All methods of sleep training involve letting your child cry. FACT: This simply isn’t true. There are a variety of methods and some of them don’t involve crying.
MYTH: The methods that do involve crying, require you to leave your child in their room until they either cry themselves to sleep or throw up from screaming so much. FACT: I have literally never encountered a sleep training method that involved putting your baby to bed and leaving and not going back in no matter how long they cry. This, to me is neglect. The methods that involve crying, have the parents going back in frequently to check on and reassure the baby.
MYTH: Letting your baby cry causes brain damage. FACT: This isn’t true. Severe neglect in infants leads to their brains not developing the way they should, but allowing them to cry while they learn to self sooth, is in no way going to lead to brain damage. (1)
MYTH: Sleep training will alter your baby’s personality or lead to personality disorders later in life. FACT: There hasn’t been any research to back this up. In fact, if your child is sleeping better and more rested they are likely to be much more pleasant and cheerful, then they would otherwise be, which in turn leads to an increase in family well-being. (1)
MYTH: Sleep training increases the risk of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS). FACT: Sleep training has not been linked to SIDS, however bed sharing/co-sleeping has and I did a whole post about that, which can be found here.
So now that we have debunked some myths, I will say that not all sleep training methods are suitable for all children. You have to find the one that works best for your family. The Journal of Sleep did a review of the 52 best sleep studies and found that there were no differences in the effectiveness in the leading sleep training methods and furthermore none of the studies identified adverse secondary effects of participating in a sleep training program. (1) With that said however, there will always be instances where sleep training could be harmful. The following except from a developmental psychologist and one of the authors of the book Bedtiming, addresses this issue:
“It depends because some kids are particularly sensitive to separations; it depends because parents can get so resentful of failed attempts at sleep training that they treat the child poorly and that, in turn, has detrimental effects (and we can’t tease apart these effects from the amount of crying the child is doing); it depends because some children’s crying, even the most minimal amounts, sends some vulnerable women into a tailspin of postpartum depression and we know that’s not good for kids in the long run; it depends because some children become physiologically so aroused when they cry that they vomit or hyperventilate and, well, that’s not good for some kids either; it depends because some children cry MORE when they’re being rocked to sleep by well-intentioned parents than they would if they were left alone and ignoring that need that some kids have to be left alone (which they can’t articulate) may actually be equally detrimental to some kids; it depends because many couples go through significant marital conflict when it comes to deciding how long to let their baby cry and marital conflict has repeatedly and consistently been found to have long-term negative consequences for children. So… how would you tease out whether it was the length of crying during sleep training or the marital conflict about the crying that made the biggest dent in a child’s developmental outcomes? (You COULD do it, but the study would be very complex and it hasn’t been conducted yet). So, yeah, it depends (and I could go on for much longer about all the factors that make this seemingly simple question so very, very complex).” (2)
Baring abnormal circumstances, sleep training of any form is actually beneficial. (1) This, article by Rachel from My Baby Sleep Guide, does a really good job at summarizing the previous research around what is arguably the most controversial form of sleep training; The Cry It Out Method.
So as you can see, the research shows that sleep training isn’t detrimental however, that doesn’t mean that every single parent should sleep train. Every parent needs to make this decision for themselves. If one method isn’t working for them, or they think it’s having a negative effect on their child, then they should stop, take a break and try something else. No matter what you or anyone decides, there shouldn’t be any judgement involved. Parenting is hard enough, without also being judged by some other parent that thinks they know what’s best for your family and your child. My advice is this; even if you adamantly disagree with someone else’s parenting choice, you should just agree to disagree and support each other in your decisions.